The Pinoy Driver's Oath

If PUV drivers are made to take an oath, this will be it:

I am a public transporation driver and I am a Filipino.

I will park my vehicle whenever and wherever I want to. I will not care if the road is only 2 meters wide and nothing else, not even a bicycle, can go through because of my incredible parking.

I will load and unload passengers on designated areas only, specifically where there is a sign that reads, 'NO Loading, NO Unloading'.

I will swerve and cut other vehicles with total abandon.

I will limit my speed to 120kph when driving along EDSA. It is a good venue to hone my Kimi Raikkonen skills.

I will obey traffic rules and regulations only when a policeman or a traffic enforcer is in sight.

I will remember the meaning of each traffic light: Red means STOP LATER, Green means GO AHEAD OF EVERYONE ELSE and Yellow means GO FASTER.

I will send SMS and make phone calls while driving. Multi-tasking is a good way to improve the economy.

I will smoke stick after stick on the road so my passengers can inhale the nicotine too.

I will wear sando, ragged shorts and slippers when driving. Clean fingernails and combing is not part of my grooming.

I am a public transporation driver and I am a Filipino.