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Thursday, March 15, 2012

What If My Son Grows Up To Be Gay?

It's fun to watch when our children dress up and do role play. Eone often pretends she is a princess, wears make up and a tiara. Sometimes she'd pretend she's a teacher and reprimand me or give me instructions similar to perhaps how her teachers in school are doing it.

As for my Enoe, he is inclined to follow or imitate what his sister is doing like wear headbands, play Barbie doll house and sometimes insist on trying Ate's dress too. It's something The Hubby absolutely disapproves and even warns the nannies that he doesn't like his son playing dolls and other girly stuff. Not that he hates gay, I think he just rather have a son who'd someday marry and spread his genes. Whatever.

from http://rhmfoundation.org/

Both The Hubby and I have gay friends who we love dearly. I think gays are one of the funniest, creative and hardworking people I've met. They are also the most loving. In fact, I believe if reincarnation is indeed true, I was gay previously. No doubt, eh?

But really what if my son turns out to be gay? What will I do? I've been asked this question a dozen times, although often candidly or in jest. My answers were also in the form of a joke like if my son turns out to be gay, I'll build him a beauty salon.

Seriously, what will I do? Nothing.

Yes, seriously. What can a mother do? I'll be disappointed, of course. But my next move will be to love him. In fact I will love him even more - because I know this world could be cruel to individuals who prefer the 'other side'.

I will be more understanding and caring and maybe even supportive because I know he will be judged, frowned at, discriminated and laughed at because of his sexual preference, regardless if he turns out to be a responsible, kind and good citizen.

If my son turns out to be gay, I will be a fairy gay mother. He will do my hair, accompany me to the nail salon and help me choose my wardrobe. We will go shopping together, watch romantic flicks and travel to the ends of the earth. He will still be my son and I will be forever be his mom or mudak, mudrakels, madir, or whatever he wants to call me.

I will be his adviser. I will tell him not to let men control his life, never buy them expensive gifts, or cellphone load or send them to school. I will teach him to accept what he is and yet still be able to earn the respect of people around him. I won't tolerate cross-dressing nor implants but heck, I might change my mind, who knows?

Bottomline is, regardless of how or what my children choose to become, I will remain steadfast in loving them. I guess that's how it is when we become a mother; we instantly possess the magic of unconditional love.

(But dear God, he is my only boy and I pray he will grow up straight, take up sports and like women the way real men do).

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